My three boys
I am a wife for many wonderful years and a mother to three boys. The oldest is 22 the middle guy 18 and the little one is 5.Almost daily either myself or husband is asked if this is a second marriage. I understand that there is such a huge age difference so I just laugh the question off.
I honestly feel blessed to have my three boys. After the birth of the middle one I was told we could no longer conceive. I developed a severe case of endometriosis. The protocol medicines were not working and at times the pain was debilitating. After years of trying many prescribed medications, natural remedies and simply trying to live with endometriosis, my doctor recommended a total hysterectomy. She fully informed me of the procedure and how it was not a life or death situation. I kept putting off the decision not for any other reason except time. Recovering from a total hysterectomy is 4-6 weeks, that amount of time just never fit into the program. Flair ups would only occur once a month, lasted for 2 or 3 days and subsided into a dull pain. My husband and I were fine with not having more children, we were happy to have 2. When the middle one was about 12 my sister-in-law conceived, for about a month or so I did wish and even looked into adoption, my husband made me realize how blessed we were. In just a few short years they would both be adults and we were free to go for that midnight cup of coffee we have talked about for years.
June 2005 rolled around, I had just lost those pesky winter pounds and ready to shop for a bathing suit. I started to feel something vaguely familiar, but of course this could not be, it had to be a stomach virus. I was feeling run down and sick to my stomach all the time, not just in the morning. A good friend of mine urged me to take a pregnancy test, she said I looked radiant almost glowing, I told her I had just bought age defying make-up! She showed up at my house very early for coffee with a home pregnancy test. She insisted I humor her and take the test. So I did, nonchalantly went with the flow, so to speak! I knew the test would be negative so I left it in the bathroom and proceeded to make a pot of coffee and smoke several cigarettes. We were consumed with conversation not noticing more that 20 minutes had passed. She retrieved the test and immediately began scream that she knew it! She practically was shoving the test in my face and I swear hugging it. I grabbed the test and just stared at the positive sign. Then stated the obvious, too much time had lapsed and of course the test showed a false positive. I did have to admit to her and myself that I was more than 2 weeks late, which she squealed at. I just figured missing my time of the month was another endometriosis symptom. I was not able to get an appointment for another 2 weeks.
For days there was a little something urging me to take another home pregnancy test. On my way to work I stopped at the drug store. A kit containing 2 tests was on sale, so why not, 2 was cheaper than 1? The instruction state that in order for the test to be accurate I should have used it first thing in the morning. But I ignored and took it as soon as I got in to work. Looking down making sure I was hitting the target, as soon as the fluid flowed pass the first window an immediate positive sign was evident. Since I ignored the instructions this again had to be a false positive. I spoke of this to no one. That next morning I snuck down the steps and retrieved the second test. I did not want my husband to know what I was doing, he probably would have committed me, after all it has been 12 years since we were told we could not conceive. Another positive!
I was a little excited and looked on-line for information. I read and read and came to the conclusion that this was a tubal pregnancy. I sat in my gyn’s office until she could see me. The office test also positive. She also thought a possible tubal pregnancy. As she set up for an internal sonogram her secretary was phoning the hospital making sure an operating room was free to perform the hysterectomy recommended so many years ago. The doctor was silent for what felt like and eternity. I looked at the screen but had no idea what I was looking at. She pointed …”This is your uterus, inside your uterus not on in or around your tubes, there is a baby, you are pregnant!”… She sounded as shocked as I felt. I was so flustered I didn’t ask any question if she was answering I heard nothing.
I somehow was standing next to my husband at his work showing him the home pregnancy test and sonogram picture. He blankly asked me who was pregnant. In an emotional outburst I told him. Tears flowed down my face and I tried to repeat myself but by the look on his face I knew he heard me. Against better judgment and family tradition we told everyone and anyone who would listen.
The next few doctor appointments were extremely scary. There was clearly a baby but no heart beat. My doctor saw me every other day, by the second week we hear and saw a strong heart beat. I was able to take a deep breath and enjoy the pregnancy. My enjoyment was short-lived to say the least! Our little gift was not very cooperative, he wanted to meet us as much as we wanted to meet him. Around Thanks-Giving I started labor pains. Yes! Labor. It may have been many years since my last son but labor is a pain one never forgets. Of course my husband and doctor thought I was just scared, doctor told me over phone to relax the pain was just my uterus stretching! I ended up in the labor and delivery emergency room. I was in labor, 5 minute apart contractions! I was admitted and only observed for 3 days. The contractions slowed down and proved to be unproductive, no dilation. I was sent home with a dehydration diagnosis. The amount of fluid I took in could have killed a camel, I wanted to wear diapers or sleep in the bathroom. The contractions never subsided, I would suffer at times every hour when they again became 5 minutes apart I was readmitted. Finally far enough along for my doctor to save the life I was given medicine to keep the cervix from opening. Too far along for pain management, not that I would have agreed. I was released after a week home on complete bed rest.
I knew no matter what statistics were thrown at me that my baby would survive, and that it was up to me to make sure of this. I wanted to give up many times and climb out of bed and just live my life as a healthy pregnant woman but I laid there and drank. Days before Christmas I was admitted again and this time to stay. My doctor and several specialists spoke with my husband and I about what could and probably will happen to my son. They administered steroid shots over a 3 day period that was to help form my sons lungs. My husband informed the older boys and family what the doctors were expecting. The pain and boredom caused me to sleep most of the time. When I woke my room was full of well wishers and sad faces, I had no response for them. My husband thought I was becoming depressed…Well! Yes I was! I wanted to be home with my boys and prepare for another, I was missing valuable time with my family.
Contraction again 5 minutes apart, this time very productive, my son was arriving almost 6 weeks early! My room was set up as an emergency situation, oxygen incubator, a team of nurses and pediatric specialists. My doctor moved in a rush and assuring my husband and I that every measure would be taken for the baby. Together they even talked me out getting my tubes tied, because another medical miracle could happen!
February 4th 2006 my son was born 6 lbs 10 oz, 21 inches long. The healthiest preemie they ever saw, I think those were the words I heard!!
My family was complete…My three sons.